God is Always Near - Part 2

When I finally shook the “fog” off I noticed immediately that something was wrong. My feet were moving at walking speed, but I could feel nothing. There was no impact to my step. My stride was consistent and I couldn’t feel my legs. How was I walking if I couldn’t feel my legs and feet? It felt as if I were watching a movie filmed in first person. It would have been more of a dream if it weren’t for the fact that I could feel my eyes.

My eyes were on fire. Not the eyelids or the area around the eye, that was numb. They were hot and they were very irritated. The irritation and light caused intermittent due to the eye lid opening and closing. They were opening and closing at such rapid rate and acted like the shutter function on a vintage high speed camera. It was the strangest feeling I have ever experienced. What happened? Why did I feel this way?

The sensation was so odd that I continued to walk toward the door and my mind began to race. As I avoided eye contact with people as they walked by I noticed something in my hands. They were the garbage stickers I had come for. They were in my hand, but I could not feel them. My attention focused on my fingers to feel any texture that I had known previously the sticker to have. Negative…nothing.

Did I have a stroke? Am I dead? What was happening to me? How am I walking? Were people staring at me? What did I tell the cashier to get the stickers? All of these questions remained with me as I walked back to the car. Imagined what I must have looked like.

As I pondered these questions and struggled to get to the car my attention went to the cold. Watching my feet shuffle forward I noticed I couldn’t feel the cold on my skin. Arriving at my car I had to retrieve my car key. How was I going to do that? My key was in my pocket and I could feel nothing. How would my hands respond or could I find even find my key?

Struggling mightily to get my hands and arms to obey what I wanted them to do I finally navigated my hand into my pocket. The skin of my hand met the point of the key and in a flash, all of the feeling came rushing back. The feeling of the Chicago winter hit my skin and I could feel brain activity again. Trying to open the car door, my feet were heavy as if I were wearing cinder blocks for shoes. Door opened and I fell into the car and lifted my legs inside.

For a moment, I caught my breath. Thankful to feel again and trying to get my body back to normal, I began to cry. Some sense of normality returning to my body I realized what happened. It was the first time and only I have ever heard the Creators voice. Why? I repeated over and over the words I heard and tried to gather what it meant. What did he mean? How would I know if I were doing his will?

Ultimately, He gave spoke, something happened to me physically and I had to find out what it all meant.